Wednesday, October 6, 2010


[proh-kras-tuh-neyt, pruh-] verb, -nat·ed, -nat·ing.
–verb (used without object)
to defer action; delay: to procrastinate until an opportunity is lost.
–verb (used with object)
to put off till another day or time; defer; delay.


the act of avoiding or keeping away from: the avoidance of scandal; the avoidance of one's neighbors.
Law . a making void; annulment.
These two things are 1) a coping mechanism that I have used 2) things I need to NOT use as a coping mechanism.  I have put off doing unpleasant things and it has cost us.  Lost opportunities - penalties - time... I get so frustrated with myself that I do this.  My 'word' for the year has been 'DO' - and that is what I have been trying to do, and succeeded in some areas (starting the business for one) ... but the same old responses to stress and unpleasant tasks have come back to haunt me.  When I realize and think about just how much I have put off (procrastinated) - and how much I need to do - I get to feeling SO snowed under and over whelmed  -  I don't think about it, so I don't get depressed (avoidance)... not like doing either of those two things HELPS in ANY way - all it does is make what ever worse.  
How do I stay on track?  How can I focus on what I need to do, and DO it?  Which task should I focus on first - and what to do with all the others that I have going?  I think that is one of the reasons why I was feeling so BLAH yesterday - I started 'thinking' (see what happens when I think?? - LOL) and I thought myself into a dark area.  I wonder sometimes if I have ADD or something along those lines - would medication help?  Meditation? The Mediterranean?  Is it because of stress, vitamin deficiency, Alzheimer? Will I always be so scattered, or is there help for me somewhere out there - LOL!  
Anyway - there is a scary glimpse into my mind - or lack there of...  now I need to get back to work...

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